Machete Enthusiast Gifts

'Machete.'

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"He loves his leaf blower."

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

'Where do I put the batteries?'

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

Mr. Evers specifically asked for a plain coffee, not an espresso.

CLEAR!

The Hammer

A crab with a utility knife claw

"You'll have to excuse my Stuart. He's just showing off his new drill.

'This will only hurt for a moment.'

'I feel like I'm in a rut, too!'

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

Handyman Christmas tree with Tools.

'Well, in the hands of my husbnd it's almost as lethal as a loaded gun.'

The next damn Batman.

'Why did you get a huge socket wrench set? You never use socket wrenches.'

'Frank, I think it's about time you bought another pair of boots.'

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

Beavers worshipping a chainsaw.

"I can now fetch anything you want - on Etsy."

Acme Slide Rules: 'We'll be here and ready, when the current electronic gadgetry fad fades!'

"Everything you need for self-assembly."