Lyric Champion Gifts

Riots in Spain about Pablo Hasél

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

'Careful, that's where the boss keeps his ego.'

"I love your optimism."

"This next one's called 'Song for Me'."

Bashful in Nashville

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Jeff Tweedy caricature.

'Henderson always walks away with the neighborhood pumpkin carving contest.'

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

"Remember that optimistic, slightly crazy, throw a dart at the wall forecast? We beat it."

Graph

Jerry Lordan

George Martin

Karaoke night.

'My love is like a red red rose...'

Musical genres

"I wouldn't mind...But he's the teacher."

Nick Cave

"Wait, so his first whole sentence was 'I don't want to work, I just want to bang on the drum all day'?!"

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

"Hey, Dad, I've been working on a song for our family band!"

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

"I'm stuck for the 'June-moon' rhyme in Serbo-Croatian."

"Yes, 'the lion sleeps tonight', I know the tune, but it means it's had a good feed during the day, which is not really a good thing..."

'Cole Porter has the lyrics checked'

"That's a new side effect of our mission to keep things together."

Tragedy! When the feeling's gone and you can't go on.

I'm a songbird. He's my lyricist.

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'