Lycra Aficionado Pillows

Yes, lycra-wearing cyclists are too fast, so the trick is to catch them mid-ride at coffee shops...

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

Knight in shining Lycra!

"It's nice but I'm starting to think we should just wait for his real hair to grow in."

A Freudian slip...

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

"I hate this time of year."

"If either of you know any cause or impediment why you should not be married, INCLUDING YouTube CLIPS, declare it now."

"I'm surprised at you, Ted. You know we're not allowed to serve alcoholic beverages to dogs."

'I drank 10 pints of rum.'

"You know I hate birthdays!"

"They say at least 80% of us are wearing the wrong size."

Zombie plumber calling out for drains...

'Another Scotch?'

'Have a drink while I slip into something comfortable.'

'How about that? -- Lady Godiva got a bouffant!'

"A high forhead can often be a sign that they've stolen a really big brain."

'How long have you had that toupee?'

"Mum, Mum, the choir master taught us to yodel today! I loved it, I want to practice every day..."

'My programmer doesn't understand me.'

Mine Host.

Loud Chorister

'You may see a great creation, Dr. Frankenstein... but I only see a great heck of a Product Liability Problem.'

England.

'I suppose we could use him as a Bass singer in a choir.'

No Dogs.