Luxury Item Collector T-Shirts

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"You're on a what?!"

Jewellery Shop: Disposable income spoken here.

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

'Don't be nervous, relax...he puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like you do. Of course, his pants are tailor made and cost $600 a pair...'

'At first I wasn't going to join, but with a name like that, how could I resist?'

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

Posh Easter Egg

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

"Mmm...'ll take these - they fit like a glove."

"Jewelry store, visit our ATM."

"We’d like a quiet table for two where my wife can justify spending three grand for a handbag."

'These new metal detectors are great!'

Who'd have guessed that the season's mast have item would be big springy shoes.

"I just wonder if the brand name is too obvious."

'Amazing! But when we go on holiday one suitcase is too heavy for you.'

"One fine day my son, all this will be yours."

Top model

"She's a Rolex. He's a Timex."

'The $1.5 trillion deficit wouldn't sound nearly as bad, if they expressed it in bottles of Chateau Lafite Rothschild.'

'The greatest wine in my collection? Why, it's my '45 Chateau Palmer and, oh, what a coincidence, it's right here!'

"You went to Barneys without me? You slut!"

Spontaneous Combustion Man - Open with care

The Mortons: It's all about our money.

"It belonged to my great... great creepy Uncle Edgar."

'So let's look at motivation. Is 'market share' what gets you up in the morning, or is it something else?'

We just assumed everyone knew they couldn't take it with them.

'Sold! $287,500 to bidder #349!'

"I think he had the idea he was looking at costume jewelry."