Lunchroom Philosopher Gifts

"Mexican food?! This is America! I want pizza!"

"My email is down... talk to me."

"You don't whisper anymore."

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

Hello, this is Cable News. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. As you know, we only have four short years until the next presidential election. So it's time to start asking: Who should run? Whom do you prefer? (A) Al Gore … (B) John Kerry … (C) Marco Rubio … (D) Ted Cruz ... (E) Christ Christie ... House of Java Cybercafe. How about (F) You? Mr. Eugene Yu is actually (T).

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

"So that's where you were last night."

"Is this a bad time for our feedback meeting?"

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

Office Canteen: 'Getting in a consultant is win-win for us... we'll get the credit if it's a success - but, if it all goes wrong, we've got someone else to blame!'

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'

"I think somebody thinks I've been away from my desk too long."

"Sorry no half portions - at least that's the quantum theory."

Continental Drift.

"I recommend the businessman's lunch, sir, mammon notwithstanding."

"Hi Mike, how's the Leprosy research going?"

Isn't that a surveillance camera?

...Five ways for the cities-towns to raise money...

"At lunchtime Dr. Jones just loves taking union talk with his fellow brothers."

That's not quite what I meant by a 'balanced diet'..

'We only get an hour for lunch, so your best bet is to brown-bag it.'

"I'll get that. First go get me a glass of warm water."

"I can see the green shoots of recovery. The fag butts are getting longer."

"Yes, Jamie -- you have an insight?"

"What is friendship if not constant amateurish psychoanalysis?"

Chinese business cuisine.

"They want to turn the clocks back?"

I have to admit, I enjoyed that fruity concoction you convinced me to try. In light of that, I will extend to you a brief respite from my usually relentless attacks upon your character.

"Carl had the mouth of a truck driver... Sorry, Carl, I just can't make no sense from all those words comin’ out your pie hole. A truck driver with a Ph.D. in mathematical logic."

"Not eating your Cheezies, Miller?"

Drinks: Tea, Coffee, Choco, Scalded Leg, Wet Shoe, Half a Cup, No Cup.

'I pretend to work.They pretend to pay me!'

"Johnson, what are you doing? It's not time for your break yet."