Loyalty Juggler Pillows

Father, if Google and Apple compete, to whom should I show allegiance? We are mere mortals. We cannot pretend to understand the meaning of this war. Perhaps it is like Zeus vs. Godzilla, or Terminator vs the Hobbit. Or even the force from Star Wars vs. the sentient tree from the planet Pandora. I have no idea what you're saying. My point. It's beyond our understanding. Computer Villa Customer Service.

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

"Dave, could you hold on a sec while I take care of some personal business?"

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

"Harold insists on doing all his own stunts."

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

"How do you love me. Count the ways!"

Stop and Birch

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'You're reordering your priorities? -- Since when do you have priorities?'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

'Jen, you knew when you married me, I was a 'corporate report' reading person - Not a 'summer fiction' reading person.'

I'd invite you in, but my husband, my boyfriend and my python are all very jealous.

"Are you going to ask for feedback every time you cook a meal?"

"You can always count on me."

Best friends without borders.

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

Complaining cricket wives

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

"He says he loves me, but he still uses his first wife's birthday as his password."

"I have been happily married... three times!"

"How much is this going to cost me?"

"I'm supposed to be loyal, relieve stress, be 'Man's best friend'...I don't need this kind of pressure!"

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

a new hire signing a loyalty oath

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

'Sir, wife number two is on line one and wife number four is on line three ... or is it the other way around?'

"For goodness sake, stop this daily whining! She's just gone to work, she'll be back tonight! Get a grip!"

"It's not what you think."

"My wife and I have a love-mate relationship."