Lovestruck Patient Pillows

"Well the good news is that it doesn't appear to be contagious."

'Hey,come on SIMON, DON'T go all shy now. It's not everyday you get the chance to meet your favourite Footballer in the flesh...'

Man and woman

"Can you check inside it for me, Mister?"

'I say we try it.'

A thief steals a heart

The Critic...

Golfers lost on the road

"Your new book, 'Help - My Head's Caught in a Pipe,' has been called by some to be semi-autobiographical. Can you comment on these rumors?"

"Wow, fishing sure is fun. I can't believe I caught such a big fish my first time out."

"You mean you blame your failure in life on not having won the Irish Sweepstakes in 1970?"

'Hollywood pharmacy: 'Thank you! Have a paparazzi - filled day!'

Shop assistant falling in love with a customer

Valentine's day...The good news is that I don't think it's contagious.

The Best of Times/The Worst of Times

The White Whale Mounted On The Wall

'There are limits to this seriousness, sir!'

"Have I told you about the time I buried my head in the sand and struck oil?"

Snake Charmer

Lark Ascending

"Sorry, Pembroke, but Telford here is lavishly illustrated."

'Oh yes... and I'll want one for the wife as well.'

"Finally a bit of good luck..."

I'm sorry Cupid, but you've lost that childlike innocence.

Man Locked in a Heart