Loves Witty Cartoons Pillows

"He calls himself orange roughy, but I remember when his name was slimehead."

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

'It's a bill collector!'

Infant care worker is exhausted from sex injuries at hospital.

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

'He thinks he's the cat's meow ever since he was made department head.'

"You must be the demolition team."

New chess piece: Cat - It can go wherever it wants, or not go anywhere at all.

Golfer in a tree.

Need to know basis

Play dead. We have to make them think their new sprays work.

Eskimos Rowing Out to Igloo

Man putting his brain in glass before bed.

'We've talked it over, and we've decided to hold you for observation.'

"Mind if I have the guys over to watch some poker?"

'However, the jurors unanimously agreed that Blogojevich is the politician with the best hair!'

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

'Do you have a reservation?'

'Don't use the sauce-it's insulting to the chef.'

"Incorrect postage, wrong zip code...it's your type we encourage to use email!"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"I mean, have you tried not being an Elephant?"

Sleeping Fish.

'You didn't chew, did you ?!'

'Between you and me, I'd rather be me.'

"Well there's certainly nothing wrong with your reflexes..."

'You must be the one interested in the job as a temp?'

"You should know better, Malloy... If I gave you a raise it would jeopardize the whole economy!"

'Don't mind Jacob. He was raised by dogs and is just committing you to memory.'

"He was riding his motorcycle with his mouth open! Let's just say it was an unpleasant experience for both of us..."

'Can't you take 'em down the recycle centre like everybody else?'

'Snake eyes or no snake eyes, the tall, skinny guy at the end of the table wins again.'

"We have an exceptionally loyal workforce."