Lover Of Pirate Lore Gifts

'Cannonball!'

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

Ghostship

'We should talk more.'

"The captain says we have to stay up here until we stop acting so childish."

Pirate King

Daily Grind...'I'm getting too old for this!'

'I bought him from a sailor!'

"Same ship, different day."

Captain's Log: Day 3 of Polly's cracker detox was a tough one...

"I made him do the plank."

Mermaid luring pirates to their death

"I can't tell a lie, Samantha. I'm a two bird bloke."

Doctor telling pirate he has termites in his wooden leg.

"I removed the carpeting and lo and behold, hardwood!"

"Because the sea can be a cruel mistress."

"I don't half fancy you. . .!"

'He tells a great story, but the truth is that he was drinking a mai tai, and the little umbrella poked him in the eye.'

'Yes, it is a nice ship but it cost me an arm and a leg.'

'No, sorry, this isn't an oil tanker.'

Flying Dutchman

Octo-Pirate

'I assume Sir requires a hands-free model?'

Somewhere on the Coast of Somalia...

"A plaster on yer knee, not much of a pirate, are we?"

'The bad cholesterol molecules are the ones with scars and eye patches.'

Pirate eye chart.

'Let's face it, Cap'n -- we're dead in the water!'

'New affirmative action rules, boys -- we have to hire some Somalis.'

Old boatmen impressing children with made up stories about having been a smuggler

Industry and Idleness - The idle apprentice turned away and sent to sea.