Fans Of Classic Pirate Lore Gifts

"A plaster on yer knee, not much of a pirate, are we?"

'Cannonball!'

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

Ghostship

A mermaid is on a rock at the sea: A mermaid falls in lover with her upper half and a shark falls in lover with her lower half.

"The captain says we have to stay up here until we stop acting so childish."

'We should talk more.'

Giant Headless Horseman

Pirate King

Daily Grind...'I'm getting too old for this!'

'I bought him from a sailor!'

Pirate Captain Wears Pirate Slogan T-Shirt

"Same ship, different day."

"I made him do the plank."

Captain's Log: Day 3 of Polly's cracker detox was a tough one...

"I removed the carpeting and lo and behold, hardwood!"

'My problem is that I'm a nice guy.'

'He tells a great story, but the truth is that he was drinking a mai tai, and the little umbrella poked him in the eye.'

'Yes, it is a nice ship but it cost me an arm and a leg.'

'No, sorry, this isn't an oil tanker.'

Somewhere on the Coast of Somalia...

Octo-Pirate

'I assume Sir requires a hands-free model?'

'The bad cholesterol molecules are the ones with scars and eye patches.'

"Are you lookin' at my bird?"

Pirate eye chart.

'New affirmative action rules, boys -- we have to hire some Somalis.'

'Let's face it, Cap'n -- we're dead in the water!'

Old boatmen impressing children with made up stories about having been a smuggler

"We 'ave an agreement, then - I'll scratch your back if you'll scratch mine."

"This turns our understanding of mermaids completely upside down."