Lover Of Ceremonies Pillows

"No, I'm not really that busy with anything important."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

A salute of scouts

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

Zumma Cum Laude

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

"I always cry at mergers."

'Does my head look big in this?'

"Did you have to go on about his being 'officially unavailable' and 'defying the nature of his masculinity?"

"Congratulations, dude, and you may now play tonsil hockey with the bride."

'What, They're comfortable.'

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

Animals of the Royal Wedding

Tribal masks.

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

Double Wedding

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

The wedding cake as Holy Sacrament.

"Just a moment, please. I would like my mother's maiden name included."

'Nice to meet you... And I don't use that phrase lightly.'

"In recognition of Jim's achievements during his long career with the company, we've put together this hilarious twenty minute gag reel..."

Restroom Practical Joke.

"For better for worse. For richer for poorer. I sickness and in health....I warned you these vows were extremely graphic."

'Tell me, Sadie -just how many times is it now that we have been gathered here today?'

Inauguration of Love

'...I now pronounce you man and wife. You may assume the position.'

Christening

the bureaucrat's desk

'Nobody really agrees about what marriage is these days, so I'll just say 'Yadda yadda yadda.''

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

'That concludes my prepared remarks. I'll take questions that fit my prepared answers.'