Lover Of Appreciation Pillows

"Your mother's going to be up there all day, kids. One of her students said her class meant everything to her!"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"This next one's called 'Song for Me'."

Donald Trump Tells a Joke...

"It turns out you can 'take it with you' if you pack correctly."

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

Teacher to student: 'I taught your father. He owes me $3,000 for therapy.'

'...if you look at it in the right way it begins to make sense.'

"This is the future of logistics. Thanks to our new technology this parcel can miss-send itself to somewhere in Kazakhstan."

'Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?'

"I'll be grateful for the small things, and you can be grateful for the big things - that way, we'll have it covered."

Thank you healthcare heroes

Elderly couple

"The Bible . . . that would be under self-help."

Cover Design to 'The Houses of Sin' by Vincent O'Sullivan

"Are you binge watching again?"

"Have you got it in beige?"

"That's the first time I've heard 'My Way' played on a harp."

"Would you ask the chef to hurry? We're running out of conversation."

"'Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point.' Tennyson"

I love Ann - I love chip butties

'It's not always the Catholics who seem the most disappointed.'

Corporate Entertainment Area

"Well, for starters I'd like to thank me."

"And if you press that one, someone will come in and tell you what a good job you're doing,"

"The money's not all that flash here, but you do get recognition for good work."

"Since when do you obey traffic signs, Billy?!"

After-Death Mints

"I know I encourage employees to take initiative, Tom... but I think you should change that back!"

A Mega-Mooer.

Fallen angel

Man changes from angel to devil in police line up.

"I don't care if he is a baseball immortal. He should wear a robe and carry a harp like the rest of us."

"I'm going to my Grandma's on Thanksgiving to pig out...and also be thankful."