Love-unlocked Gifts

Relationships.

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

A sentimental woman talking to her lover on a ship

"I'm just so relieved! I thought you didn't love me anymore, but now I realize I was just projecting!!"

"He says he loves me, but he still uses his first wife's birthday as his password."

Real Estate Personals

Cupid and parachutists.

An old man and women are driving along with a 'Still married' sign on their car.

'He's not so much a rough diamond, more a dumb block of carbon.'

Mine Shaft of Love.

"Why would I care if you're not a pure breed? That's a human concern! Sure, I'll go out with you tonight..."

"Sometime I find it hard to believe that we found each other through regular channels."

"My aloofness is a mask."

...In a Relationship

'Wait a minute - This is getting too close for comfort.'

Tunnel of Life and Love

Wait

'Next time you lose the school's keys, please call a locksmith instead of using a blow torch on the door.'

"I've had many men in this town darling, but many men have not had me."

'Love and marriage?- I'm afraid I can't help you much with that, young fellow.'

Valentine's day...The good news is that I don't think it's contagious.

Bumper Cars of Love.

'Come now - surely we can draw up this pre-nuptial agreement amicably.'

'We've been happily married for five years, but we've been married for eight.'

"You have no idea how refreshing it is to meet someone raffish in West Hartford."

The Face Mask

"She's an enigma wrapped in a mystery wrapped in a bear onesie."

Snake Charmer

'My dream boat has turned out to be an anchor dragging prune barge!'

"Look, like I keep telling what's-her-name here, we don't have a marriage problem."

"To be honest Marsha, when I first met Ted, I couldn't stand him. Then, over time, he just seemed to grow on me."

'That's the guy - lives on a 'narrow boat!'

"Cute... But way too young."

Love Park: You Are Here

'Get lost. Can't you see I'm with someone?'