Love Bug T-Shirts

"Do me a favor: this year, go nuts. They could use it."

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

"It is against computer viruses!"

Cherubs holding big heart.

"So whassup, babe?"

Mantis Love

Girl In Bed

"Oh there was a locust plague alright and lots and lots of possible love interests, but your mum was a real standout..."

Never marry the girl next door: 'I know you better than you know yourself!'

You give me butterflies!

'Baby, I'm giving you all of my heart, just not the same heart I gave to her. She still has that one.'

"I brought protection."

"They're so adorable at that age!"

Sauvignon Bonk

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"We've discovered they mate for life, as long as they don't discuss politics."

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

"Honestly, sweetheart, you're not like the others I've been out with."

'Trickle or Spray!?'

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

You're the botanicals in my gin

Adam and Eve: Reconcilable Differences

Mary, remember that you're pregnant and are now eating for 2,000.

'Which one is named after me?'

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

"I have such strong feelers for you."

Fruit Fly Job Interviews

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

"Do you think someday we'll look back on this and laugh?"

"Oh, sorry, I wasn't flirting with you – I was checking my phone."

Love Trap

'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'

'Marriage? With all your pre-existing conditions Reggie, my HMO would never approve of you'