Lounge Artist T-Shirts

Or insist on giving him unsolicited advice...

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

Blues artis's daily list

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

"I wrote a poem, even though I'm on vacation."

Couch Potatoes

"Sometimes, when business is brisk, I have to settle for no nap at all."

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

"I'm not 'just sitting here' — my mind is all over the place."

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

Man on lilo keeps getting irritated by flies/birds.

Fly Club Singer: 'Wherever I Lay My Eggs, That's My Home...'

"Well, sometimes I'll just hang around and do nothing. Oh wait, that's all the time."

"Have you ever known anyone famous?" "I have." "I've always been great friends with Randy 'The Rock' Taylor." "What? That's you." "Carry yourself like everyone knows you, and everyone you meet will feel like they should know you." "Hey, you all over there! You know me!" "You don't carry things with your mouth."

Lion Choir.

'For this dish we're going to need two bottles of good quality red wine. And that's before we even start cooking.'

Conductor Smokes Musical Notes.

'I waste Sunday worrying about Monday, so I compensate by making Friday my Saturday.'

'Why is so much easy listening so difficult to listen to?'

Patient to therapist: 'How is this supposed to help me stop being a couch potato?'

"Why, James. James the Munificent. How good it is to hear from you."

Happy little clouds

"Have you seen my onesie?"

Getting older is . . . when you start to dress for comfort rather than style.

Singer and Pianist.

"Why are they called sweatpants if you don't sweat in them?"

"When blues singers lose it"