Lottery Jackpot Dreamers Pillows

'We're reconciled-thanks to the Lottery rollover!'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

Why do you hate the media?

"Well, it's been nice. And obviously the £10 million win hasn't change you. . . . A mug of tea an' a couple garibaldies - as tight as ever!"

'Joe has been partying hard!'

'It's in my belly-button if you must know!'

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

'I'm sorry, Bob, it wasn't you who won the mega-pool. It was Helen in accounting.' (to man mooning boss).

Highlights for Adults

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

Comparing lottery odds with bus punctuality.

"And to think he started in accounting."

Honorable mention in science: the Nobel surprise.

'Congratulations! You've just won ten million dollars!'

"Oh boy! I've won the- "

SMALL BUSINESS LOANS, 'Your business plan seems to depend on winning a lot of state lotteries....'

"Baldo, check it out...it's advice for people who've won the lottery."

Your Winning Lottery Numbers Told: 'If they are really what you say - how come you can only afford a tent?'

'Of course, it's marvellous news! Absolutely marvellous! My Word! A national lottery winner! Wonderful stroke of luck!'

'He's expecting a letter from the dog biscuits sweepstakes.'

'Ordinarily I wouldn't do anything like that, Mr. Hubbard, but I just hit $2 million in the lottery!'

'I'm not sure, but I think illegal gambling is when you win.'

'IT'S NOT YOU!'

"I know when they are sleeping, I know when they're awake..."

"If I had a million dollars, I'd buy myself a new car, a new house for Dad and new clothes for Tia Carmen!"

"And make it quick. I need those numbers yesterday – before last night's lottery draw."

'Great, a 'Powerball ticket', I was hoping for something more like an olive branch...'

An affair to remember.

"One of his employees won the lottery!"

'Has anything changed since your Dad won the lottery?'

"Why would space aliens save the human race?"

"The good news is, my son is a potential winner, bad news, I'm still buying his lottery tickets."

'Long term I like energy and transportation stocks. Short term I like lottery tickets.'