Lost In The Woods Wanderer T-Shirts

"My GPS says we’re not even close to the trail … and it’s blaming you."

"Ahhh... close enough."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'Not that net!'

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

Sausages.

Poor guy fell asleep with his head in the sap.

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

Sport Utility Boot.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Man runs into Bigfoot taking a selfie.

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"Have you guys seen my recent collab with the universe?"

Toivola Jones and the Search For Spring.

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

"I've got you in my sights now, Mister Squirrel, with your fluffy tail and those tiny hands clutching that itty-bitty nut. Aww, you must be hungry...poor little fella... I love you, Mister Squirrel."

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"I got ninety-nine problems, but a birch ain't one!"

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'I was told this was a big deer crossing.'

"Listen, pal, I’m not seeing a ‘giant squirrel eating a rib-eye steak.’"

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

"I brought cocoa."

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

"OK Dad, I've counted and categorised all the trees in our part of the wood: Now we can start on our sustainability plan..."