Lost And Found Lovers Pillows

You are Here- But Do You Know Where Your Kids Are?

'Be fair, George - how do you expect me to find your contact lens in this lot?'

The Ladies of Kew encouraged everybody to recycle.

'It looks like our data.'

Give way - 'Oh, alright then...'

A mermaid is on a rock at the sea: A mermaid falls in lover with her upper half and a shark falls in lover with her lower half.

'Words can't express how much I Love You - so I'm writing an equation.'

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

'Did anyone hand in a mature stilton last week?'

"Don't you think even if there'd been no John Cardner and no Comon Cause, we'd have found each other anyway?"

'It's too wet for walkies and I can't find my boots!'

'You're not supposed to block off an area to look for your contact lens.'

"My husband is missing. I haven't seen him since he started wearing camouflage clothes."

Bureau of Missing Persons

'I seem to be on the range but 'home' is proving illusive.'

'Special offer today -TWO for one, sir!'

Happy Valentine!

'That's right, the Princess kissed me by mistake: She didn't know the difference between a frog and a toad...'

'I'm telling you I don't know where your goat is, look in the classifieds.'

Golfers lost on the road

Directions.

'Next time, spring for a little more, and get a GOOD GPS'

'My member requires some interest.'

Fishing poles/Honeymoon gondolas.

Lost dog/Lost Sheep posters

A stranger in paradise.

Statue of Liberty holding energy saving light bulb.

Weary man at Lost Property depatment. Assistant says: 'Sorry sir, no one has handed in your mojo.'

"By God, you're right. This is a three day weekend."

How oysters get engaged: 'Oh Rodolfo...It's exquisite.'

"The problem is, all I think about is sex, all you think about is amphimixis."

'It must be love, when he kisses me, my heart quakes 5.7 on the richter scale.'

'...so you wouldn't have to spend any money in the pub.'

The Joy of Hex

"Mittens found it! It was stuck in the sofa."