Longevity Explorers Gifts

'If I'd known I was going to live 900 years, I'd never have opted for early retirement.'

37 years in the same position.

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

The Age of Reptiles. . .

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

"I had that nightmare again where everyone found out I'm in my late thirties and still have no idea how the stock market works."

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

"It appears that you'll definitely outlive your usefulness."

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"I said remember those extra years we added to our lives by good clean livin'?"

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

"I became a mentor because I needed more direction in life."

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

Doctor to Banana: 'Looks like you're going to a ripe old age.'

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

"Oh f*ck yes. Let's make these f*ckers live for-f*cking-ever."

"Great, now we're lost."

My philosophy ... If you can't beat 'em, outlive 'em.

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

'I have the feeling my expiration date is nearly up.'

Midlife: You Are Here.

"The one day we decided 'To hell with hair!' "

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

"Breathe in...now breathe out. Excellent! Just remember to keep doing that for the next few years and you'll be fine."