Lonely Gourmet T-Shirts

Dining Alone

Soup of the month.

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

The Origins of Everything

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

"I hope you don't mind leftovers."

How lazy people decide what to eat

'It's another cookery programme but It's aimed at children.'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

Cat eating fish from fishbowl.

Boy baking a cake.

'That's funny... I could have sworn I saw the chef put him on the platter.'

'I made a substitute in the recipe. Take-out.'

'Haven't you ever heard of warmed up turkey?'

'You have to lose weight. Stop having intimate dinners for two, when you are not expecting anyone to join you.'

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

'If that's the way he feels about chemistry, there's no harm done.'

'It's all made by stateless people, wanderers, nomads, whose only anchor is cheese.'

Chinese Novel Cookie

"Damn it, who ate all the chèvre?"

Man eating his meal with his feet.

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

'Now watch and listen!'

The four major food groups.

"Sure, organic free-range poultry is more expensive, but consider all the guilt you're saving."

"Well, we went through the fruit and veg, and thought we should try something more exotic - like the space-time continuum."

Picasso paints AND eats like a child!

'It's just Frank's ghost returning for a bottle of wine. It doesn't tend to keep well, where he ended up.'

'Oh no wonder, this is Extra Virgin Mary Olive Oil.'

'Not only do you get out of cooking tonight, but you found a place with a lazy chef too.'

Spaceman serving shrimp.

'Oh please uncle Jim! Tell us another creepy story of the living!'