Log Love-in T-Shirts

"I brought cocoa."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

Christmas Drinks 'n' Nibbles System

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

"And thirteen innocent logs perished in that fire they used to burn Joan."

"You like it? We purchased the fourth wall from 'Westworld'."

"I had half a date last weekend."

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

A Woman's Conquests.

"I thought you might like to hear how my love-making sounded when I was a younger man."

The sound of a crackling fire licking at seasoned logs...

A man and a woman click together.

"It's not jsut that he walks upright and uses complex tools. He also makes me laugh."

'I'll need four character references.'

Godfrey Hunting for Lodgings

'I set the alarm to 96 years!'

'Wow! I feel so good this morning, I think I'll call in sick!'

Less than Ultimate Fighting.

Before the invention of writing, ancient wisdom was passed down the generations orally, through the art of storytelling.

'I never forget any of my girlfriends.'

Castle with parking lot.

"OPEC tighten the screws. the Larned A. Corys are ready."

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

'Woodruff, find out everything you can on a crazy thing called 'love'.'

Loggers Destroy Industry.

"Sir Eustache is searching for a coaster for the holy grail."

"Maybe if we put stone statues in their place, no one will notice that they've flown away."

"Perfect!"

'This is the most unusual post & pier construction I've ever seen.'

'Can you call back? He's busy right now.'

Adam and Eve

"We give up. What is your log-on password?"

The Ekert Saga: '...We'll be safe...as long as the Ekert is kept in the sacred vessel of nay-chaw. And he has to stay in theah until we find the anti-Ekert.'