Living Vicariously Champion T-Shirts

"We need to hurry to your next extracurricular activity before the void of my unfulfilled ambitions catches up."

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"The knights of the round accent table"

"You're good at asking all the right questions. Now let's hear some right answers."

Missing You.

Car joust.

Coronavirus Windmills

"Before I fight this dragon and rescue you, can I ask a few questions? Like, do you want kids? What's your passion? Where is 'home' to you? Do you have a financial philosophy?"

What a gentleman imagines while he holds a door open.

My Knight in shining Armour.

Don Quixote

'I think I'm getting somewhere. On the way over I stopped to smell the flowers.'

"Are you cold dear?"

Gadzook used armour. Only one careful owner.

"A gentleman would offer his seat."

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

'You won!'

"No, you don't need to slay a dragon or go on a quest to prove your love to me. I just want you to keep your castle a hell of a lot cleaner."

Chivalrous Snowman

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

'...and I share my prize with the maintenance dept. who have worked tirelessly to keep the clean room perfectly immaculate.'

A Knight slides down the stair rail.

Sir Cowalot.

"I'm telling you Sancho, these are giants."

'All right, Lancelot — Have you got a woman in there?'

There he goes, the bravest M&A knight that our little kingdom has ever known.

Sign at Hospital: 'Road to Recovery ... Under Construction'

"Refresh my memory-why do we meet once a week?"

"What happened to women and children first?"

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

"I saw your ad on the dating site, ma'am! You're looking for an old-fashioned man, aren't you?"

"Yo, Mr. 'Knight of the Round Table' — this isn’t cilantro, it’s parsley."

"Relax dear. You haven't 'put on a ridiculous amount of weight'. You've just forgotten to take off your armour."

'You're on our turf, this is poet's corner.' 'It may be your corner, friend, but it's on writers block.'