Live Show Enthusiasts Pillows

Intramission

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

'It's good - but it's not digital quality.'

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

Theatre Crowd

Applause

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

'You have an enlarged funny bone.'

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

TV and cleaner

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

'I'd like now to do a blues number, for those of you here on Viagra. It's called - Woke up Early One Morning.'

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

'What do you MEAN this IS the show?!! Let me see the tickets!'

'Is there a fireman in the house?'

"This next song is called - 'I want to kill you'."

'Get Doc Weston and Tell him I have a fever and to come over quick. We have a show to do tonight.' The talking dog goes over to the doctor's house and simply says 'woof'.

"I warned you not to buy your top hat and tails from that ex magician!"

"Ok, ok, how's everyone feeling tonight besides a thousand dollars poorer?"

My client vigorously denies your charges. He says he has great respect for what makes you special. He knows that you like Amy Winehouse, watching The Office, secondhand clothes. You're reading off my Facebook page. He knows you're on Facebook. You're both off my friends list.

'You said to come back once I got my act together.'

"This one's for me."

Half time entertainment at many small clubs was a bit basic.

Police Box

'Thanks for tuning in - we'll try to pander to you.'

People who enjoyed this busker also liked: Joe. 7th and Miller. Sandy. DuPont and Reed. Carl. 39th and 2nd. Thank you.

"You're on kid. Break a string!"

'It's not a punchline to an office joke or TV commercial, Perkins. 'You're Fired' - for real!'

David Letterman

Antiques for Oldies: Squeal Now.

Street musician: 'Opening in VEGAS next week'.

'I hope he doesn't pick on ME!'