Live Performance Fanatic Gifts

"Coughing, or non-coughing?"

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

"Here's a request from someone who'd like to hear something in tune for a change. Oh, we have a comedian out there, I see."

Comedy Cafe

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

'She sounds like your mother when you told her that you were going to marry me.'

Mikado

"Tong!"

See, Catty-O? I told you dinner was included with admission.

Opening night at the circus: "How's everyone's jitters?"

'You're thinking of your wife again, aren't you?'

Chuck played mean hair guitar.

Tenors

"They're texting it in."

Indian snake charmer charms a snake.

Don't put your daughter on the stage Mrs Worthington.

Drama is the highest form of culture. It combines literature, art and music

Fire starts at magic show while audience participant is left behind.

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

Around the piano

"This is it, everybody. Jack and Harriet Schroeder sing Harold Arlem."

'He's is in a bad mood tonight!'

Rock n'roll.

Johnny O'Keefe and Jack Benny.

Old Vic / Adelphi Theatre

"I'm going to a concert by a really famous superstar....he deserves to be pelted with expensive organic tomatoes!"

'That should be an easy act to follow.'

"Tonight Mathew, I'm going to be, Charlotte Church"

Ballerina and the light switch.

"You have the right to remain silent!"

"Must be the life to work in a castle. You get paid by a rich king and you don’t have to go through every shift smelling elephant butt."

Pianist takes his bow whilst the singer carries on singing.

Intramission

Ventriloquist Speech Therapy.

John Cleese