Little Screecher Gifts

'This is my little brother -- He believes in freedom of screech.'

A young Don King

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

"Open wide please! So I can get my hand out!"

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

'Outside with that!'

"Relax. They're just crows."

'All I wanted to know is if that word was naughty.'

"No more tickling Daddy for awhile, 'kay Puddin?'"

"Great idea. Movies are so much better on the big screen."

'The man was real nice about it. He gave me my ball back and even said you can expect a nice call from his lawyer.'

'We studied the multiplication table in school today -- frankly, I don't believe a word of it.'

A boy blows a raspberry at birds

I disturbed the class by talking in my sleep.

"He started talking yesterday. It didn't take him long to start a podcast."

'Stick em up' Kid plays with gun

Naughty Kid using a bin lid as a catapult.

'Do I use the slide or the merry-go-round? I haven't even touched the swings. I don't know. I DON'T KNOW.'

Kid to other: 'It's been a crazy day. I caught a bug and tossed my cookies.'

'You're going to have to stay confined to the bunkhouse for a week.'

"Baldo, time to get up! It's the first day of school!"

"She's always writing in that journal of hers. Maybe she'll be a notary public when she grows up."

..And if you unstick my hands from my nose, I promise I won't touch the super glue in my dad's toolbox ever again.

'If you shoot your foot off don't coming running to me.'

'Reflexes normal.'

"I don't really believe in the tooth fairy anymore, but if it pays, I play!"

"I think we can stop worrying about his bed wetting!"

Children's Self-Help Books. How to Look for a Lost Toy Without Moving a Muscle. It IS Possible to Make a More Annoying Sound! Tying the Impossible Knot. Mom! MOM! Moooooom!

"All you said was for me to go to my room and clean. Since you weren't specific, I cleaned my computer's hard drive."

Boy about to poke a man from behid with a stick after having seen a pantomime