Little Patient Gifts

'Don't try to turn tail and run. That's just what they want.'

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"We're playing doctor. Do you have any old magazines for our waiting room?"

Playdough's The Republic

'This test doesn't understand me.'

I think I can, I think I can ... therefore I think I am...

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

A young positivist.

Invoice: 'That's good laughter is the best medicine.'

"Let's play make-believe. I'll diagnose you with a life-threatening illness, then cure you with a wonder-drug that turns out to be a placebo."

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'

There aren't any serious side effects — just an occasional Elvis sighting.

Life on Earth - maths advice.

Junior Doctor.

'Let's play doctor - you be the patient, you be the surgeon, and I'll be the malpractice-attorney.'

'Let's play doctor. You be the primary care giver and I'll be the doctor you refer patients to.'

'We're playing Doctor - he's the caddy.'

Young Galileo Galilei.

"If something is neither here nor there, where is it?"

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

'... Because it's the law! That's why!'

'What happens after the end of time?'

'We studied the multiplication table in school today -- frankly, I don't believe a word of it.'

Love.

'I usually don't make house calls but I'm glad to make an exception in your case, Gran'ma.'

"Trust me, Son, you do not want to 'grow up to be president.' "

"I decided to get comfortable...we have a lot to talk about."

"It's not icky - it's tactile."

"I've just performed a tonsillectomy on Daddy while he was asleep."

"Dehumanization, maybe, but not depersonalization."

"Yesterday's weather forecast was wrong. Is that what is meant when they say 'fake news'?"