Little Historian Pillows

'Can I still be a Yankee Doodle Dandy even though my birthday is May 25th?'

On a school trip to a museum, a child takes the head of a horse statue and runs through the museum with it.

Archimedes statue with a lever

A trevor of trainspotters

"Let's have some fun kids, he says, let's play Easter Island."

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

Shrewsbury - pronunciation

"Coming soon...what I did over summer vacation...the podcast!"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Pied Piper

'This 'Hamlet' thing you're working on... Do you think you could write in a part for Lady Godiva?!'

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

"I'm getting it registered as an historical landmark."

"... No, when I say, 'you must let go of the past' I mean you must return that vase to the museum you took it from."

'I can not tell a lie concerning the cherry tree: mistakes were made. However, I must consult with my spin doctors before saying more.'

"R.V. Lintel- Inventor of Polyroc

A caveman attempting to make a cart

"My book is actually about 12th century Etruscan pottery but I thought it might sell better if I aimed it at the children's market."

Scottish Independence: The Union Jock.

"She's always writing in that journal of hers. Maybe she'll be a notary public when she grows up."

Mummy has set up a pulley system in his sarcophagus.

'I draw on the walls and get time out. They do it and get famous!'

"I'm deleting history so there will be nothing to study for tomorrow's history test."

"You've really outdid yourself this time. A real masterpiece!"

"This is your great-great-great grandfather Luis. He met your great-great-great-grandmother at the store where she worked. He was there to buy a lawn mower! She sold him a sheep. They hadn't invented law mowers."

Unexpected Help for the Colonists at the Boston Tea Party

Style

"Hydro density apparatus invention? Go away - I'm not disturbing his bath for that!"

"Who gives a crap if it's not clear in 246 years?"

"Ancient times? Is that like when my grandmother was young?"

'I'm thinking something a little more modest... say, whatever 1,000 slaves can do in 50 years.'

'These are the happiest days of your life.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Excalibur.

SOUTH CAROLINA SECEDES, 'See - I TOLD you that you couldn't fool all of the people all of the time!'

Ancient man