Little Chronicler Gifts

"She's always writing in that journal of hers. Maybe she'll be a notary public when she grows up."

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

Frank and Ernie's Lesser Known History. Lemonade. Custer's first stand.

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

'Your life story?....why not, the world is in need of a few good laughs!'

Wedding Selfie

"I'm taking detailed notes of everything, so I can tell my kids what things were really like when I was their age."

'I got an 'F' in penmanship, but it doesn't matter. I plan on becoming a doctor.'

Back to School

On a school trip to a museum, a child takes the head of a horse statue and runs through the museum with it.

'I looked, and the Ten Commandments don't say ANYTHING about running with scissors!'

The young Lisa Laflamme.

'Did you know I have 3000 bones in my body?'

"I am studying the alphabet. I'm watching ABC."

"Oh, it's not a baby book, it's his memoirs."

'That's all for tonight, God. Stay tuned.'

'Is there a secret handshake or anything I should know?'

"Yes, you should have studied harder and no, you can't unsubscribe from 5th grade."

'I draw on the walls and get time out. They do it and get famous!'

"What are you doing?! Where are your crayons?!"

Trump Campaign Funding

'He says the scent killer isn't working. He can still smell us.'

"I think it's a bit late in the evening, Harold, to tell them about your watershed experience."

'I'd love to tell who did it, but I'm protecting my source.'

I confess, I'm one of the bloggers that's hurting the journalism business. You? I blog stories about my local community. You have journalistic training? Of course. I've spent years watching Shepard Smith and Montel Williams. The visitor wept with respect. Shoot me.

'Someday I'll go to school like the big kids!'

'My composition is 'parental discipline and what we can do about it'.'

'How much longer will you be working on your autobiography, Shelly?'

'Can I still be a Yankee Doodle Dandy even though my birthday is May 25th?'