Little Actor In Training Gifts

"Just be yourself."

My First Camera

"We're playing doctor. Do you have any old magazines for our waiting room?"

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

'I'm not playing 'Bride and Groom' unless you sign this pre-nuptial aggreement!'

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

Happy Turkey Day!

Yo! Emmett Kelly raps! (with ringmaster flash)

'We'll send you to acting class when you're older. For now, get up and get ready for school.'

"I can't tell you how it ended. That would ruin the sequel."

"I'm making pink lemonade!"

'I play an evolving character, In the second act, I'm a piece of pie,'

"Simon, I'm not really interested in your juvenilia."

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a sugar buzz.'

To Be/Not To Be

"First let me say that your father and I really, really wanted to like your performance."

"My report on summer vacation. . . Book and movie rights are available for $1000 each."

'Of course he's an actor. When was the last time you saw a kid enjoy something that was good for him?'

'We've run out of one-man plays - why not make it up with the rest of the drama group?'

'I'm playing a crowd member in the Easter pageant. I was going to play Pilate 'til I found out I'd have to wash my hands.'

"All of the art work is for sale."

Child placing crayon drawing over TV screen

"The quality of the writing is an embarrassment, it has no style, no fluency, no soul!"

'All I'm saying is that Rembrant must have had a rotten childhood.'

"Can we teach our child how to create art digitally."

Pantomime auditions - 'He'd be ideal as Buttons.'...'Oh, no he wouldn't.'...'Oh, yes he would!'

'I feel too much pressure to draw, mom.'

A child pretending to be on tv in a busy street

"There's a big difference between being a method actor and a meth OD'd actor, Burt."

'This hand puppet is ambidextrous. It can be used on either hand.'

"I haven't had the heart to tell him vaudeville's dead."