Literary Show-off T-Shirts

"You may not want to read this book but you'll certainly want others to think you've read it."

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

German Expressionist Breakfast

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

"Mrs. Berg calls my book report a finely crafted debut and she looks forward to my next effort."

"Barb's such a fast reader."

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

"So, what are you reading?"

Books / Coffee table books

Shakespeare's Brain

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"My dad says this pencil was once used by William Shakespeare." "Is it 2B or not 2B?"

"Some Debussy, Igor."

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

Shakespeare in the clink

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

'Cap'n Ahab, Sir! Starbuck wants to know if you fancy a coffee.'

Franz Kafka

Three Witches from Macbeth

The Taming of the Ewe

"Wallace couldn't come, but I brought some of his fussy prose."

"Today we will focus on how the author makes the same exact complaints about here life, from her sixth birthday and on."

"Gracie, don't worry so much about your big test... You know, when I was your age, I didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'. Until I looked it up."

"If all the world's a stage, I'm beginning to wonder about the PLAYWRIGHT!"

"Somnambulant... somnambulant."

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

"It's lost all meaning in the steroid era."