Literary Dabbler Gifts

'Excuse me. Could you point me towards the books that would look impressive on my bookshelf?'

Bookworm Sleepover

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

"I had that nightmare again where everyone found out I'm in my late thirties and still have no idea how the stock market works."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

"Isn't it obvious? I'm writing the great American graphic novel."

The novel was printed and in the stores ... any minute now, the world would beat down his door.

"I wish you would actually sell one of these novels...all these returned manuscripts are giving me backaches!"

"Hey - I'd write a book, too, if I could find the time."

Don Quichotte

"Not now. I'm working on my children's book."

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

A Poet

Heaven

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

"Would you mind taking a look at this collection of my poems? Your opinion would mean a lot."

"Dear Mom and Dad: Thanks for the happy childhood. You've destroyed any chance I had of becoming a writer."

'My dad is pushing me to become an alpha male, but frankly, I'd rather be a poet...'

'I'm still working on my novel. In the meantime, and this is between you and me, I make ends meet by writing all those cat memes you see on Facebook.'

'Your novel has an up-to-the-moment breaking news quality. We intend to publish it in 2012.'

'It began as The Great American Novel...but it finally sold as an infomercial.'

Writer Blinds Shakespeare in Shame.

"I'm in here, rereading the great poets, myself among them."

'What's this? You're suing me because the prescribed medication made you 'irrationally exuberant' in a down market?'

The writer's world

"Just thought I'd let you know that the stars are in the exact same configuration as when Mary Shelley wrote 'Frankenstein'."

"That's my novel."

'The editor told me my novel is very foresighted - I shall submit again in 2079!'