Liquid Logician Gifts

"Next time you drink to forget, could you at least remember to pay your bar bill!"

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

Thinking Gears

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

'Here's MY information highway!'

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

Yound Einstein disproves an early theory: 'Aha! A watched pot DOES boil!'

When Engineers Crack.

'Have you no common scents?!'

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

How to get from A to Z. Right brain versus left brain.

Reasonableman

'You can't come in here with that.'

Staff Yearbook

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

Skeptic: Critical Thinking, Facts, Debunking.

Illogic Tree

'Stevens, get in here. I need a few minutes with the left side of your brain.'

"Yo, this should be a two."

'All cats have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a cat.'

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"Oh my God, help! Is there a logician on board?!"

"That's ridiculous. A red nose wouldn't work as a GPS system."

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

Oz Debating Society. You can't refute everything I say just by call it a "straw man" argument.

Professor of Fuzzy Logic.