Logical Thinkers Gifts

"I wish that life was as logical as Algebra."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

Thinking Gears

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

Thomas Mann.

Math Dreams

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

'Here's MY information highway!'

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

Sigmund Freud.

When Engineers Crack.

'Have you no common scents?!'

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

How to get from A to Z. Right brain versus left brain.

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

Staff Yearbook

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

Reasonableman

"Bonk!"