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Bar offers seances to 'get in touch with spirits'.

A Good Batch.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

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'You can't come in here with that.'

Wanna talk about it?

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

My first mistake.

Hotel mini-bar.

Now THAT, my friend, is a beer garden!

"I'm addicted to water."

"Brian's considering the optics."

"Yes, I'm the Cowardly Lion, and I want a double shot of single malt courage for the Yellow Brick Road."

'Water is a valuable good and we should use it sparingly. That's why I'd like my Scotch straight.'

"What wine goes best with vodka?"

"Right now we're at a budget impasse. I maintain that you provide an essential service, and my wife feels that you do not."

Profiles in Courage

'The numbers don't look quite so bad along with the hard liquor.'

A sign at a bar above some stools reads "Express Stools (3 drinks or less)".

'Which one has the highest alcohol content?' 'That one.'

"Please, John, not the cheap Scotch. My body is a temple."

'Once I get started I drink like a fish.'

'Which' Consumer Testing Whiskies

"For a full third of my life I didn't drink. I was asleep!"

An artists drinks alcohol while painting on a canvas.

'I don't rate black lipstick - liquorice is less messy and more flavoursome.'

Congratulations, Willis. You're being promoted to 'partially treated sewage'.

Aprés-ski, Aprés-curl, Aprés board

'When I told him we had no wine, he just kept going.'

I ordered a Pink Squirrel. I took that as a cry for help. Beer is what I use to help people.

'...and how did the acupuncturing go?'