Lip Balm Hoarder Gifts

"I can tell when you're just kissing me to get some of my lip balm, Josh."

'All I'm saying is that we need to be a bit more careful with our money...'

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

"I feel bad for the companies that make lipstick."

Kissing the Fish

First love.

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

"It isn't fair! Why aren't thin lips fashionable?"

"I brought my worn out shoes because I heard that confession was good for the sole!"

'Bradley is a strict vegetarian. Do you have broccoli flavored lipstick?'

Beach goer squeezes sun block tube and a t-shirt pops out.

"Why do you wear green lipstick?"

"Buckle up. We're in the midst of an unprecedented breadcrumb recession."

'Please Pass the Moon Tan Lotion.'

Modern day mirror.

"My father said I was too big for my britches!"

'So Grandma's arrived then.'

"As you can see, hands are about to hit peak dryness, so we're predicting record lotion sales for next quarter."

Joan Collins

'Was that your signature kiss?'

"He is so gross: He is a hoarder you see, and keeps all his old skins..."

"We're headin' into town. 'Course I'm gonna moisturize."

"It was an emergency, Officer. I had to phone my style consultant to ask which lipstick I should be wearing."

After an argument, they always kissed and made up.

"I don't care what they say about lipstick on pigs... That shade looks great on you!"

"There! Just like new!"

How I feel with....liquid matte lipstick, lip gloss and chapped bare lips.

'Wax Lipped Cow'.

"I love the smell of lip balm in the morning."

"Read? I don't read. I just collect."

"With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!"

'Mom puts lipstick on so Dad knows where to kiss.'