Light Bulb Jokester Gifts

Why dyslexics have lower electrical bills...'No' (on switch).

"How many rabbits does it take to screw in a light bulb?"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

'Got to admit,as far as mission statements go, it's pretty damn bold.'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'The cash bonus incentives don't appear to be having the desired results. So, I've hired Rocky, here. He'll be providing the heads of the least productive departments with his own brand of incentive. If you know what I mean.'

National Boss Monument.

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

Chritmas Party - "What in our own time?"

Clowns in the board room: 'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to, well, pie.'

"Personally, I'd like to hire you, Mike, but the company has some serious concerns about your core competencies!"

'I recognize the face ... I just can't pin down the name.'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'We like your style, but hate your substance.'

"Make sure the coffee has extra caffeine. I want the employees awake during overtime."

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

Corporate Ladder and Corporate Elevator

"If you really want to get ahead you'll need to stop licking your own butt and start licking mine."

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

'I think our only choice at this point is to take the next big step.'

'So, paternity leave problem solved then?'

'Imagine if it was this simple to upgrade our staff.'

"Who's your daddy corporation?"

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

'Well, I was looking for a yes-man, but I guess a toady will do just as well.'

Do you think room service could bring me an ice lolly?

"Read the part when I invented micro management."

"The boss told me I have to start at the bottom."

'If people who have sudden ideas really had light bulbs over their heads, it would be very dark in here.'