Lifestyle Dreamer Gifts

'It's a midlife crisis - he doesn't know anyone with a vacation home that he can mooch off.'

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

Serenading

Cat Panels. Cats soak up sun on rooftop like solar panels.

"So...do you have a job now?"

Private Jet

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

Converted Parking Garage

The Day Dreamer.

'I'm a star!'

"Time like these make me wish we had sprung for that apartment with a park view."

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

"If he didn't live each day like it was his last, he would have lived another 40 years."

"It all started when I didn't grow up in a palatial estate."

"I know by outward standard I'm successful, but a voice inside my head keeps saying, 'Where's your private plane?"

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'

"One day, son, all these skyscrapers that we built for no reason and lie empty will be yours."

"Falling leaves. That's what I miss most of all."

"That's not the thrum and rumble of the great metropolis -- that''s the dishwasher."

Immigrating to the City

"He's very well off. He's got all the quantities I admire."

Urban Compost Heap.

"This can't be happening! I'm supposed to be a cool adult! At least I bet I have a cool car!"

"In the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen episodes."

Persons of Faith

Yes, well, when you're grown up and king, your castle can have an indoor heated moat.

"I'm a Big Apple kinda guy, stuck in the Garden State."

Letter On Its Way From Omaha To New York

'Too acidic? On the contrary, I find it well balanced.'

'From up here they look like us.'

"I want to be a footballer's wife."

'This baby says you've arrived. A little late perhaps. Missed a turn, had to stop for directions, but eventually got there.'

"I lost 5 pounds and you didn't even notice!"

In The Spring, A Young Man's Thoughts Turn Fancy

Next: I'm STILL a 'D' list celebrity - sack my agent!