Lifesaver Fan Pillows

'I'm in hock up to my ears, I work in a dead-end job for eight bucks an hour, my wife and girlfriend are both pregnant - and you think you need help!'

First aid in mountains

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

Lifesaver!

Don't worry, the first 30 years as a paramedic are the hardest.

The grim reaper racing a lifeboat to reach a drowning man

Dog being carried off by ducks.

'I hope you all appreciate the irony in this.'

Screensaver says project compiling.

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

"I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?"

"I don't tell you how to gather."

"The one time it's good to go with the flow."

"These NHS types are ALWAYS complaining about SOMETHING!"

Hi, my name's Pam and I'll be your paramedic for the evening.

"It's cut my heating bills right down."

'Correct. And in the case of a cardiac arrest, every second counts. Who can tell me why? Anyone? Clock's ticking.'

'I've invented food, and I've invented shelter -- two out of three isn't so bad!'

Double life.

A doctor in her kitchen agonizes over the ethics of pulling the plug on her ailing toaster.

Thank You...For Everything You Do.

"Does anyone know CPR?"

Sorry Jack, but I can't call the Firemen to get you down...

'Sam was one of the keenest recruits they'd had in years.'

'HEYYY!! He's cheating!'

'It's addicting... I watch it eight hours a day.'

'Yeah, but look at the money he's saving on gas.'

Saving the leaf.

"I believe I prefer crawling in the desert to crawling here in the artic."

Paramedic

'Sounds like illegal immigrants.'

Animal Crackers. It says, "Expiration date: Cats - Oct., 2017. Dogs - April, 2019. Tortoises - Jan., 2070".

No, I told you, only take rocks from the checking pile, not from the savings pile.

First Aid