Life Planners Pillows

"Face it - there is no good time to get married, have children, and move to Jersey."

"Wait, it's Thursday? I thought it was Tuesday! The first day of the rest of my life was supposed to be Wednesday!!"

"Life’s become pretty easy lately. Perhaps it’s time we shake things up by adding a dependent."

"Great, now we're lost."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

"We only got six days of funding."

Pipe Dream.

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

"Three more years of high school."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

"Excuse me, but for some reason you have us traveling with our kids."

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

When Engineers Crack.

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

Grounded

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

"I'm getting so old I don't remember where I buried my bone..."

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"I think you might need to start again."