Life Guard Gifts

"Hey, you doing the backstroke, you've forgotten some thing!"

Clown Life guard

Life Guard finds Oil.

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"He likes it."

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Timmy had one heck of a security blanket.

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

'What's the big deal about acid rain? Can't we just make alkaline rain to counteract it?'

A Hard Look At Hard Looks

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

Monkey-artist

'Put a tick under 'very toxic'.' (New Orleans Toxic Clean-Up Team).

"For goodness sake, not again, it's day-time but we can't see the sky: It must be another oil spill..."

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

"It's trickle down."

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

Swimming Prankster

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

"We're here to recharge our batteries."

"We first met on the beach. He was a lifeguard and I was a poor swimmer."

Saved...life is good!

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

S.P.F. 1,000

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

Fish want out of polluted river.

Lifesaver!

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu

"I said, 'I'm not on duty! I just came back to get my flip-flops.'"

"Sometimes, plastic in the ocean isn't bad... Ooh, that bottle cap will make a lovely bowl for Ed and Nicole!"

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

Fish Posting No Fishing Sign