Life Coach Humorist Gifts

"I live for the moment. That moment just happens to be in the indefinite future."

“I know you’re really busy right now, but when you have a chance I’d love to pick your brain about how you got to where you are today.”

Remember, when life gives you lemons, whine and pout and cry until life can't take it anymore and gives you cookies just to shut you up.

"Today is the first day of the rest of my life! That's a lot of stress to deal with."

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

Lactose Intolerant

Surfing the daily stress

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

PSA Banter.

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

Providing Healthcare For All

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

What else is there to wish for?

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

Self-esteem room

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

'Will I live Doctor?' 'Yes, but I don't advise it!'

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

"Is that your idea of a well balanced diet"

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

"You need to justify your own existence first."

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

Meditation