Life Choice Explorer Mugs

'Mom, Dad, I've decided to skip my senior year of college and jump directly into chronic unemployment.'

"Call me?"

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"Did you get my tweet?"

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

YOLO vs YODO

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

"I became a mentor because I needed more direction in life."

Book of Life, Answers in Back.

"If he didn't live each day like it was his last, he would have lived another 40 years."

"Great, now we're lost."

'I wish I were your age again, and knew what I know now.'

"...as the devices were nestled on their chargers with care,..."

"If you're ever granted three wishes, don't blow them all on a giant body with tiny arms legs."

"To tell you the truth, I never thought downward mobility would be so, well, downward."

Danger Quicksand

"Some days I really wish I had finished med school. Not that I ever started med school."

People crossing the street while texting use white canes.

"I love talking to you about my problems. We should do a podcast."

Seven males, ranging in age from a baby to an old man, wait in a line monitored by a uniformed guard.

'This isn't any comparison to my going through menopause!'

'Oversensitive Car Alarm'

"Do you think he's taking this security blanket thing a bit too seriously?"

How?

'Instead of a baby sister, Dear, Daddy and I will give you your choice between kitten or puppy.'

"Excuse me, can you tell me where I might find the colostrum?"

'Please tell me there's more to this than this.'

'Too acidic? On the contrary, I find it well balanced.'

"The latest version of your life is now available to download."

The meaning of life...

Essential Oils/Forbidden Fruit.