Lei Lover T-Shirts

'The #1 Lei Girl!'

Archimedes statue with a lever

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

"This stool shall pass."

Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'

Margarita

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

"This is not what I meant when I said you needed to practice your play fighting..."

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

The Lemmings of Montauk

We regret to inform you that your poem, "The Ramen," does not meet our publishing needs at this time. The short, frustrating career of Edgar Allan Typoe.

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

The Critic...

"The animal kingdom is truly wondrous -- and everything's edible!"

"Oh, my husband is a great provider: his hunting success rate is close to 30%..."

Bradley Wiggins

Always a popular motive: Hunter and Prey.

"Is this the home that needs an exorcism on a gamer?"

"Man, what I wouldn't do for one of those free-range meals right now."

City Zoo: 'Try our exotic composts in your garden.'

Game Addiction

'Where's all those lions we were told are out here?'

"I'm so sorry darling: the shop was out of anti-dandruff shampoo..."

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

"I tried that new detangling shampoo."

'The Polite Lions' - a new sim game - "We've already got chairs, thank you."

'We've got 'Jumpin' Jake' Stevens on drums, 'Slick' Chuck on bass and 'Wasted Pete' Walthons on the trumpet.'

Lion Dreams

"Your eels are enormous - where do you get them?"

"Your new book, 'Help - My Head's Caught in a Pipe,' has been called by some to be semi-autobiographical. Can you comment on these rumors?"

'I need a Vacation.'

Reality Bites

Go Back to New York

The Best of Times/The Worst of Times

'Sorry, I've been head-hunted by another pride.'