Legal Language Learner T-Shirts

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

"How do you say ‘Where is the bathroom’ in Sanskrit?"

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'

'Stick them up...'

"Letters would be all right if they'd just let us leave them in alphabetical order."

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

'This is the fun part...waiting to find out just what we've ordered.

"We make crime pay."

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

With the aid of a tactical dictionary, and was finally able to make sense of what the salesman was saying.

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

"What's another word for 'thesaurus'?"

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

Populating URBAN DICTIONARY.

"...Any more of that fowl language and you're barred!"

Lady Justice.