Legal Linguist T-Shirts

'No, no. I told you to look for a precedent.'

Lawyer sees street sign: Parallel Paralegal Parking.

Henceforth including, but expressly not limited to love and honor and cherish and ... These vows are light on romance, but they're iron-clad legally!

'My trial marriage was dismissed for lack of evidence.'

'I'll accept two potions of white crystalline sucrose in final settlement.'

'No, I'm not interested in hearing a counter proposal.'

"...and Bexley has kindly offered to wrestle with any philosophical problems we may encounter."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

'His idea of campaign finance reform is insisting on small bills.'

'Miss Carruthers, check and see if we have an extradition treaty with Disneyland.'

"The Supreme Court says a corporation is a 'person?' Well, have you ever tried to take a corporation out for a nice, friendly beer?"

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

Truth

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

'There have been a few niggling little concerns expressed about the lack of diversity in the supreme court.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

Lady Justice.

Statue of Security

Words that can result in employee litigation box.

"We're in luck, not a word about retrospectivity."

Sub Post Office/Sub-Justice

Comments. Complaints. Constitutional Amendments.

"It says here an increasing number of Brits blog and tweet in Afrikaans. Why?"

"Manafort's was the best flip yet."

"To indict or not to indict... No, to charge or not to charge... No..." "Don't worry. I know how this turns out." "Mueller's Hamlet"

The hour of justice

Equal Justice Is An Illusion

Museum of Natural Cliches

Antonin Scalia

Upholding the Law