Legal Jesters Pillows

"Perhaps this will refresh your memory."

"Got outta jury duty!"

'He's training for a career in law.'

"...and we hope that, for a cyber-crime, you will consider a cyber-penalty."

"Thank goodness I convinced them to put this playground outside of the courthouse. Now it feels like recess."

'Do you have a plan B if you can't find work as a frivolous suit litigator?'

The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

COWS: Cow Pong

"He belongs to a lawyer."

Medieval headlines.

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

'I gotta admit - this 'jury by my peers' idea of yours is looking pretty good.'

"Twenty five years! But your honor,

'Have you seen the ruddy margins the Chinese expect us to take up for this work?'

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

SANTA'S ATTORNEY

"In view of the new evidence, my client would like to change his plea to 'guilty-ish', M'Lud."

"Instead of 'fraudulent,' the defendant requests that you refer to him as 'fluent in the ancient language of duplicity!'"

"The charge is loitering, your honor."

'I take it his performance review went well.'

'Yes, it's a foul. But is it a flagrant foul?'

"Oh well, what does a jester know?"

'Your Honor, permission to abandon the strict, upstanding, fiduciary responsibilities of my profession for a chance at fleeting personal, carnal gratification?'

The afternoons are okay, it's at night that I can't sleep.

'We, the jury, find the defendant guilty... and his attorney obnoxious.'

'Well, you were convicted on three out of ten counts - at least we beat the point spread.'

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

'What could I have done? The defence's motion was written on legal tender.'

'I like to use the Law as a jumping off point.'

'I believe it's 'feed a fever and starve a lawyer.''

"How many surprise witnesses do you have in that little car?"

'Why can't I park it here? I'm just getting my moneys worth.'

'He said his first buzz word today!'