Leash Juggler Pillows

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

Then you go over me … I go around you … and ta-da! A double fisherman's bend! Next-level leash knot.

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

A child and his dog

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

Jumping Dogs

Confused drivers

'Well, I don't believe it Your room is spotless And in just 10 minutes,,,'

"We keep revisiting this leash thing... Why is it so difficult for him?"

"History test? But I studied all night for a math test!"

'I understand yours is a highly coveted position in this company.'

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

Tom Mullica.

'Your mother and I are worried that all these video games may be having an effect on you.'

"I have to get this project finished."

'I know my electric bills are way over due, but could you at least wait until the Super Bowl is over before turning off my electricity?'

Sorry, sir, but today is Tuesday, and I never did get the hang of Tuesdays.

Incompetent gardeners cause havoc

"She's cute, but she's eroding my power base."

'Mac, when are we going to get the pickup truck fixed?'

"You want my undivided attention? I don't think it exists."

Excess Baggage: The concept of electronic ticketing still has a few airline passengers spooked.

Well, I can't sit around all day - I have things to do.

"I'll be walking by your door in a second if you want to try to get my attention."

Moving and Storage: "Did they say moving?"

The Dog

Stew considers getting a shorter leash for Spot.

'We didn't expect you this early!'

'Oh great. It's Western and I use an English saddle.'

'Yo Bitch' - 'Nice Ass'

"I think we're supposed to connect the positive wire here and the negative wire there. But I can't."

"Try switching hands when you walk the dog!"

"Can you come outside and help me. It appears Fido and I have tied the knot... "

"I've got to figure out how to get paid for work dreams."