Leadership Laughs Gifts

"Maybe yes. Maybe no."

'It's odd...when I was CEO of Phoenix Industries everybody laughed at my jokes, but since I've been retired, nobody does.'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

'Here's the CEO - Chief Egotistical Official!'

'Who vetted that leader?'

"I love this work-from-home concept. Now I can fire someone without going to the office."

See District Directors

"King and clown—why can't I be both?"

"Appears to be choking on his responsibility."

'Ah, Reeves - it's lonely on top!'

'I'm looking for someone to keep the blood off my hands.'

'A lackluster style got me to where I am, and a lackluster style is going to keep me here.'

You know what I like about our meetings? There's always more finger pulling than pointing.

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

'Not in here, stupid - I don't need to!'

President of rubber band company shooting rubber band at employee.

'Frankly, I don't remember why I called this meeting.'

"Alert security, the buck has failed to stop here and is loose in the building."

Security Alert in the Paperless Office. . . .

'When are you going to show some INITIATIVE, Findley?', 'When you TELL me to, sir!'

Becky Thornmorton: The most popular girl at Central High's annual Easter egg hunt.

'Did you or did you not make my client laugh so hard that milk came out his nose, causing the kids at his cafeteria table to laugh at him?'

Wheels for all purposes.

Pigeon Breeders' Association.

"If only the men could see my fun side."

'We operate on the point system here. When you see something go wrong, point at whoever you think is to blame.'

Learn to Laugh at Yourself

'Leaders need to be prepared to make sacrifices and you're mine!'

'To motivate every single employee is one of the main principles of my management style. Well, if you don't meet the sales targets, you'll get sentenced to death.'

'This is a business, Peterson, not a democracy.'

'The head of our script department!'

'When all else fails, try doing it the way the boss told you.'

Having just been elected leader of the pack, Marty decided to tell the others the truth.