Ldr Survivor Pillows

"Miss you, too."

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Would you like to see today's liquidized menu?"

Desert island has bottle bank and paper bank. Castaway sees message in bottle float towards island.

Gymnast tangled up.

'My new year's resolution is to stay home next new year's eve.'

'How do you like the new cubicle?' - 'Can I have my old office back please.'

Tax grab.

"Is this the queue for Funworld?"

"God it was rough coming into the office this morning after the awards ceremony" "It must have been, you work two doors down"

'Damn, so close!'

'Thank you for calling the IRS... Press one for laughter in the background, press two for crying in the background.'

'Inside of me a thin person is struggling to get out. I find that person can be sedated with a piece of chocolate cream cheese cake.'

'I'll be right with you as soon as I feed Buzzy.'

"I just want to learn enough to be able to survive the train to work."

Appointment for Central London Executive - With Car and Parking Space

Generation Rend. Young man rending his garments in anguish at extortionate rents.

ALLIED CHEMICAL PRODUCTS, INC., 'I'd like to transfer out of Research & Development for awhile.'

'I simply don't understand the requirement to pay people more just to live in London!'

"New Year's Eve just isn't the same anymore!"

White flag being waved through the door of the Internal Revenue Service.

"The Motor Vehicle Department had some concerns for my safety."

'Relax - this is only tax hell.'

'I said, now I know why they call you 'Lucky'!'

'If you didn't have a hangover you'd have one now...!!'

A holiday maker greets a castaway

'I'm celebrating, I came from my teenagers birthday party and survived,'

'Goddamn traffic...I'm late for my meditation class.'

Lather, rinse, dry, style, get dressed, go to work,come home, eat dinner, go to bed, wake up, repeat.

'When they said they had the 'screaming trots' I thought they meant a band!'

"I'm raising four kids, a husband, three pets and I work. This is nothing."

'Dr. Jekyll, how well do you know this Mr. Hyde who prepared your taxes?'

'I can't find a darn thing wrong with your return -- could you come back tomorrow?'

Man following advice on preventing sea-sickness but becoming sea-sick anyway