Lazy Genius Pillows

"Why do I have to go to school? Why can't I just log onto their website when I get up?"

"Is this a creative nap or a nap nap?"

"Think of it -- you'd never have to fold another shirt."

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'You say that this gadget will cut my work by half? In that case, I'll take two!'

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

Soup of the month.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"Ah, ha! The universe IS expanding! I can't find my glasses anywhere!"

Gracie's baby toys.

'A Great Big Bang. An I-Can-Read Cosmology Book'

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

How lazy people decide what to eat

'I've chosen you for fresh, new ideas.'

"It's a 'pencil' - It's like a pen, except that it's made of wood!"

'I need to do more exercising? Are you kidding?! I'm a kind of marathon runner! I run from the bed to the fridge, then to the table, back to the fridge and then to the TV, back again to the fridge and retour to the TV day by day!'

"These are smart socks. They will crawl themselves to the clothes hamper when you throw them on the floor. Make sure they're charged before wearing them."

'I made a substitute in the recipe. Take-out.'

"Isn't technology great? A drone dog walker."

"Some people call this an elementary school. Not me. I call it pre-med."

The little engine who could, but decided not to- 'Ah, the heck with it!'

Do it yourself - Get someone else to do it

Segway Workout

"Gracie, I'll never reveal my secret to being the smartest girl in the third grade."

"I don't want to climb the corporate ladder. I'd prefer to take the corporate elevator."

'OK, my dinner's in the oven. Where's the oven?'

"If the rest of school is like first grade. . . this education stuff will be a breeze!"

'Not only do you get out of cooking tonight, but you found a place with a lazy chef too.'

'... So one day I thought, hey, why walk all the way out to the mound just to take a pitcher out of the game?'

'Well you know the old saying... if you can't beat 'em you can always google someone who can.'

Chapter 3. Andrew's scheme backfires.

'My sex education teacher called me a know-it-all.'

'NEW Down hill exercise bike'

'How does he get away with it? If he's not playing with the mouse, he's sleeping.'